Chapter 1: All About How A Dating Service Works
One thing to remember when sending messages through online dating agencies is that your message may get forwarded to someone else. You know how it goes - friends share little secrets and your message might be one secret they also share. You should consider your message to be an open letter and as such you should think quite carefully about what you are prepared to reveal about yourself - especially in the first instance.
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It's also very easy to give someone else the wrong impression of you when using personals sites. We touched on this earlier when we said that you only have your written word to get your meaning across - no facial expressions - no inflexions of the voice to convey humour or any other feeling. What may be a slightly sarcastic comment or even down right humorous can come over as a real put down. Consider the use of emoticons to convey your meaning - they could save you from upsetting someone you're really keen on!
You may be computer savvy or you may be a long term user of online dating agencies but others may not be - so you must forgive other people's inexperience or mistakes. Some people may not have used a chat room and the language may, therefore, be alien to them. Be patient - they'll get up to speed. We were all newbies once! It's easy to type when you've been doing it for years and using emoticons and abbreviations all the time! In most cases it's best to keep things simple and avoid littering your messages with too much techno-speak until you know whether the other person is comfortable with it.
Always be courteous and do not even think of sending hate mail or offensive messages, especially if you have just received a rejection. Almost any of the quality online dating agencies will have no qualms whatsoever about removing your messaging privileges on receipt of a complaint about you. Replying to a message needn't be that hard. Read the message you've just received very carefully. Did they ask you questions? If so, answer the ones that you feel comfortable answering. Did they talk about their interests? If so, ask them a little more about them to show that you are interested in them and their lifestyle. Perhaps you share a common interest or hobby? If you do then great - this can keep you messaging each other for ages and allow you to develop the relationship in the process. You should also try to reveal some things about yourself - what makes you 'tick' etc. Always ask some more questions in your response to make it easier for someone to write back. The easier you make it for someone to respond to you the more likely it is that they will. You musn't make things hard work.
Next - E-mail advice for single girls and guys.