Chapter 1: All About How A Dating Service Works
Excellent news! This is where all online relationships first start. Now stop doing a lone Mexican wave in front of your PC and read the message. OK, now read it again and take in what it says! If you don't like what you read at all then it's a quick message back saying 'Thanks but no thanks.' However, you are far more likely to want to respond - there aren't many messages that are so bad that you don't want to get to know this person a little more - after all it could be the start of one of the best online relationships ever! Now what should you do?
You could play it cool and decide to leave it a few days before you respond - not smart! You could dash some drivel off and send it - don't do it! You might be just about to go away on a business trip or holiday - send a nice note saying that you got the message and you're interested in talking more (if you are) but that you are going away. Make a definite commitment to write back on a particular date if you can. What if you're interested, not going away and don't know where to start? Tricky, but all online relationships have to take their first faltering steps somewhere - it's time to bite the bullet!
Register free with Pearmatch.co.uk and search for online relationships with people just like you!
The important thing to remember is that you registered with your online dating agency to find online relationships and so did they. They've taken the trouble to write to you - so they are interested in you. You've got to drop a pretty big 'clanger' to kill it in one message so make sure you've read the advice on messaging in this guide and get thinking about what you want to say. Use their message as a starting point together with their profile and aim to get a message back to them within a day of you receiving theirs. If there are any questions in the message that you don't particularly want to answer then you can just ignore them. Hopefully, the other person will pick up on the fact that you haven't answered them and take the subtle hint that you're not comfortable answering yet. It's also probably a good idea to write out your response in rough first so you can read it back to yourself and see how it sounds before sending it.
You probably don't want to get too 'heavy' in your first reply. Of course, you should thank them for writing to you and open up a little about yourself and your life. You could start talking about what happened to you today or this week so you allow the other person a small window into your life. You must interject this with asking a few questions of them - but don't get too personal - and you must be positive. Nobody wants to read a first response from someone that is just whining about their life and the blows it has dealt them - it's an almost sure fire way of finishing what might have been the start of a good relationship.
Online relationships do just happen out of the blue. It's very possible that you could find someone that you instantly 'click' with but it is safer to expect a slow start - but be prepared for things to move more quickly than you could have imagined possible!
Next - Can UK dating sites really find me romance on the internet?