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Chapter 4 heading

Dating Services Finding True Love

The majority of people that register with dating services are looking for true love. In short - a long term partner. You remember that we seem to always recommend writing lists - well we're going to again here. There must be a whole load of questions that you would like to ask a potential new partner. Write them down! Undoubtedly there will be some that you will think 'I can't ask them that!' We'll come on to those a little later on but there are some basic ones that you should ask to protect your own feelings though.

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Before you can find true love the most obvious question is whether the other person is available or not! You shouldn't assume that everyone is single who registers with online dating services. Apart from the few liars that you find the world over, your definition of single may be slightly different from someone else's. Someone who is legally separated but not yet divorced may think of themselves as being single but you may not think that's single enough for you. Obviously this is a judgement call that only you can make but you should ask the question so you have the facts to make a decision on. On the other hand we would always recommend that you don't make a snap decision based on prejudice. For instance, if you've never dated a divorcee before how can you reject someone as being unsuitable for you? Just because one relationship went badly wrong on them doesn't mean that a second one will - it may not even have been their fault! There is also an argument to say that because someone has had a relationship go wrong on them then they are more likely to want to find true love second time around and will know and understand the warning signs before anything does go wrong. It is far more likely that any problems in the relationship can be fixed by talking about them rather than going your separate ways.

It might also be a good idea to ask how long it has been since the end of their last relationship and how serious it was. You probably don't want to be an emotional cushion for someone who is on the rebound. If your potential partner can't stop talking about his or her ex then you might wonder just how 'over them' they are.

Some people register with dating services very soon after breaking up with someone as a knee-jerk reaction. Having been in a relationship for a while it will feel very unnatural for them to be alone and people sometimes have this feeling that any relationship is better than no relationship at all. Look out for the signs, and if you're prepared to be a support in the hope that things will go your way then fine, but just be aware that the 'mourning' period for what was considered to be their one big relationship can last a long time - sometimes even years.

On the other hand, it should be stressed that most people who use internet personals such as Pearmatch.co.uk are not 'walking wounded' from a previously rough relationship. Users of these services are ordinary people just like yourself who have decided to use cyberspace to broaden their social horizons in the hope of finding a suitable partner. Why not give it a go - there's so much to gain and so very little to lose!

Next - How about asking the difficult online dating agency questions?


Personals Guide

Chapter 1: All About Internet Dating Agencies

Chapter 2: How To Use A Dating Agency

Chapter 3: Get Messaging!

Chapter 4: Moving The Relationship Forwards

Chapter 5: Dating!

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